I had to wait for Mikey to get older to
celebrate my birthday? Was it really for me?
Mom and Dad always said they treated me
and Mikey the same.
But it was obvious they were playing
favorites.
How could I have been so blind last time?
“No thanks, I don’t like cake.”
I turned her down flat.
Mom frowned and came over to hug me.
“Ashley, don’t be mad. You and Mikey are the
same to me. You’re both my kids. I love you
<
the same.”
Dad chimed in, “Yeah, what parents don’t love
their kids? Mikey’s still little, Ashley. You need
to cut him some slack.”
I just looked at them without saying anything.
Then, to their surprise, I broke free from
Mom’s hug and headed upstairs.
It was always like this.
Every time it was my birthday, they had to
bring Mikey into it.
First, they were busy with Mikey’s first
birthday party and forgot about mine.
And when Mikey got older, they insisted on
く
celebrating together in the name of family
unity.
They’d pick out Mikey’s favorite cake, go to
Mikey’s favorite restaurant, and if Mikey
couldn’t make it, they’d rather let me go
hungry than start without him.
It was supposed to be my birthday, but they
always managed to turn it into Mikey’s show.
And these were the same people who claimed
they treated us both the same. It was
ridiculous.
This time around, I wasn’t going to fight with
Mikey for their “love.”
Focusing on my studies and making
something of myself was the only path
<
forward for me.
Time flew by, and soon it was time for my
middle school entrance exams.
Just like last time, Mom and Dad were too
busy paying attention to their little darling to
even notice that I’d applied to a prestigious
middle school, and that I’d have to go across
town every day after school started.
Even though I’d done this once before, a part
of me was still excited.
Mixed with the excitement was nerves, |
asked Mom and Dad if they could come with
me when I went to register.
They said yes without hesitation.
But on the actual day, Dad got a text
message as soon as we got out of the car.
He showed it to Mom, grinning from ear to
ear.
“Mikey got a spot in that fancy daycare! We
need to hurry and sign him up!”
“Yay! Mikey gets to go to school! Mikey
doesn’t want to go with smelly sister!”
Mikey, who was three years old, clapped his
hands and shouted with joy.
He’d barely learned how to talk, but some
people just weren’t meant to get along.
My little brother didn’t like me, and he would
even hit me if I got too close.
く
Mom, who had been walking in front, turned
around to look at Dad’s phone, her eyes
shining with excitement.
Dad turned around and carried Mikey back to
the car without saying a word.
Mom stayed behind, giving me a long,
complicated look.
“Ashley, honey, can you go sign up on your
own? I’m so sorry, but Mom and Dad need to
sign Mikey up for daycare.”
It was exactly what she’d said last time.
But last time, I’d fallen apart in public.
I burst into tears and begged Mom not to
leave me.
“Dad can go by himself.”
Back then, I still thought of Mom as my last
hope.
I could keep telling myself that I wasn’t
completely unloved.
“But Ashley, Mikey’s still little. It’s more
important for him to go to daycare.”
Mom bit her lip.
“Next time, we’ll come with you next year
when you start school, okay?”
I didn’t say anything.
く
After a few minutes, when she saw that I
wasn’t going to answer, Mom just turned and
left.
I watched her go, not really feeling anything.
It was probably for the best.
From now on, I wouldn’t let anything Mom
and Dad did affect me.
I stood there for a long time, numb.
Then I turned around and went into my new
school.
I was the only one registering by myself.
And after I had successfully completed the
registration process, Mom and Dad had even
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more reason to ignore me.
Everyone just assumed I could take care of
myself, that they didn’t need to worry about
- me.
So, I threw myself into my studies and tried
not to let it get to me.
Middle school was different from elementary
school.
I was in the honors class, and it was filled
with brainiacs. I had to work hard just to stay
at the top of the class.
One time during the winter break, Mom and
Dad suggested going to New York to see the
ball drop.
く
I figured I could use a break, so I agreed.
New York City was packed, and it was
freezing.
Mom and Dad were glued to Mikey, who was
jumping around and excited.
I just followed along behind them, carrying my
backpack.
We all did our own thing and kept out of each
other’s way.
But then, Mikey suddenly got distracted by
some flashing toys in a nearby stall.
“Mikey wants a toy! Don’t go!”
The little kid broke free from Mom’s band and
The little kid broke free from Mom’s hand and
charged into the crowd.
“Mikey!”
